A Question About Prayer

“What do you think, Preacher?” My missionary friend Archie posed a probing question as we rode together in his van. “Does God answer prayers for which there is no Bible promise?”

Before venturing down this path of sometimes difficult theoretical and theological inquiry, I replied with a question of my own. “Why do you ask?” I was not trying to evade a challenging question. I had long ago learned that questions like the one Archie asked were rarely the product of simple conjecture. I suspected that there was a circumstance or a story behind this inquiry. And indeed, there was.

“An elderly man in my church told me he had been praying that he and his wife would die on the same day. They had been married for over sixty years, and the thought of one spouse living without the other was unimaginable. So, he had been praying that God would take them both to heaven on the same day. He wanted to know if this was alright. I had never heard of anyone praying like that.”

What followed was an interesting discussion between the two of us about the nature of prayer. Of course, there is no question that God answers prayer. The Bible is clear about nothing if it is not clear about this. But does God always answer prayer? Are there certain prayers He answers, and others He does not?

Prayer is not wishful thinking. God wants us to plead His promises and ask according to His will. “This is the confidence that we have in him, that if we ask anything according to his will. He heareth us.” (1 Jn. 5:14)

Sometimes sin is the reason God does not answer prayer. Jeremiah wrote, “Your sins have withheld good things from you.” (Jer. 5:25)

Sometimes God answers, “Not yet.” Sometimes God answers, “No.” Paul asked God to heal him from what he called a “thorn in the flesh.” God did answer, but not with healing. Instead, God gave him strength and grace to live with his infirmity. (2 Cor. 12:9)

God knows better than we do, and sometimes He gives us not what we ask for, but what is best.

As a child, I asked my grandfather for a G.I. Joe action figure one Christmas. When I opened the gift he purchased for me, I discovered instead a toy astronaut helmet. I should have been grateful. I confess I was disappointed and a little confused. But he said to me, “I went to the store intending to buy you what you asked for, but when I saw this helmet, I thought of you, and I knew you would want this more.”  In the months following, I got more enjoyment from that gift than I would have from the toy for which I had asked. Whenever friends came over to my house, they wanted to play with that space helmet. My grandfather was right. He knew what I would like even better than I knew myself.

But back to the question at hand. What about prayers for which we have no biblical promise? Jesus taught His disciples to begin prayer with, “Our Father which art in heaven.” (Lk. 11:2) Those who trust in Christ are the children of God. (Gal. 3:26; Jn. 1:12) And just as an earthly father tenderly cares for his own children, our heavenly Father cares for us. (Ps. 103:13)

My first grandchild is my only grandson. Some time ago, I promised to take him to a baseball game. I kept my word. While we were at the game, I bought him a new baseball cap. When a man came near our seats selling cotton candy, my grandson’s face lit up. Yes, he got some. I promised my grandson a ball game. I never promised a ball cap or cotton candy. But I take delight in my grandson and so gave him what I thought would please him.

I do not always give my grandson what he wants. God certainly does not always give us what we want. But we are His children in whom He delights. And He just may answer a request for something He never promised.

Archie knew more than he initially told me about the elderly couple in his church when he raised the question about prayer. They had both recently passed away. They died within hours of each other on the same day.

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David A. Oliver is the pastor of Ashley Baptist Church in Belding, MI.