Let Your Words Be Few and Godly
Covid descended upon me in December, and our home became very quiet. Due to potentially coughing every time I wanted to speak, words were few and my wife lived in “Silent Night.”
During those days, this thought came to mind: Most of us talk too much, and too often about things that don’ t matter; many of us do not talk enough about what’s really important.
Then the following arrested my attention one morning while reading the latter chapters of Job in his response to God, Behold, I am of small account; what shall I answer you? I lay my hand on my mouth. (Job 40:4). Having told his friends to put their hand over their mouths (21:5), now Job knows he must do the same lest he speak out of turn with God.
Perhaps it would do each of us good to take a cue from Job.
David prayed something along the same lines, Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips! (Psalm 141:3)
Please, honestly ask yourself the following questions. Do some personal inventory as I have.
- Do I need to put my hand over my mouth?
- Do I need to share “that information” with everyone, and is it completely true?
- Do I gossip, participate in gossip, or listen to gossip?
- Do I need to give my opinion on everything?
- Do I speak of other’ s sins but seldom speak of my own?
- Do I talk about others more than I talk to God about others?
- Do I complain and whine and criticize rather than rejoice, encourage, and praise?
- Do I talk more about myself and what’ s on my mind than talking about my Savior, my Lord, my Friend, my King and what He has done?
Solomon put it this way, A truly wise person uses few words; a person with understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise when they keep silent; with their mouths shut, they seem intelligent (Proverbs 17:27-28).
Don’ t let Covid have to teach you this important lesson of life. Lay your hand to your mouth (Job 40:4).
Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life; he who opens wide his lips comes to ruin (Proverbs 13:3).
Those are general thoughts about our speech, now let’s think about how we talk about church.
- “Well, I walked into church, and no one spoke to me!”
- “Every Sunday, my heart is stirred, and I leave knowing I have met with my Lord!”
- “Our preacher (fill-in-the-blank)!”
- “All our church knows to do is ask for money!”
- “Our kids’ ministry is awesome!”
These and a whole host of other statements, both positive and negative, true and false, have been and continue to be said about the local church. I want us to consider what is said to others about the local gathering we attend. Let’s look at one of them.
“Our church (or, That church) is so unfriendly!”
There’ s a quick remedy for that one. Proverbs 18:24 reminds us, He that has friends must himself be friendly. Next Sunday, before you get out of your car, pray by yourself or with your spouse or your family, “Lord, I surrender to You, Who dwells in me, to be friendly, compassionate, listening, and caring to all we meet. And, lead us to the seats in the auditorium where You want us to sit today that we may help move folks around one step toward Christ.”
Think about it. If we tend to say that our church is not friendly, then perhaps we are not friendly because we are the church. We as born-again believers are the body of Christ. Therefore, when we gather, we are more than just friendly on “the outside.” We desire to go deeper by showing mercy to those around us. We greet others with a firm handshake or a fist-bump or with raised eyebrows (for mask-wearers) and a word of greeting. Try to refrain from the norm, “How you doing?” and move on.
If you are greeting a visitor/guest, stop, speak to them, give your name, listen for their name(s) and use their name(s) immediately so you can begin to remember it. Put yourself in their shoes. Consider how you can make them feel at home; as if they were entering your living room. As you chat with them, don’ t be in hurry. Introduce them to those serving at the Welcome Center. Ask questions and give guidance to the auditorium or nursery or fellowship area. Pray with them.
Sometime during the week, send a thank you note or a text or give them a call to let them know you have prayed for them. Make sure they know you genuinely care.
True friendliness is grounded in the person of Christ. He spent time with His disciples and others (John 3:22). He initiated conversations (John 4:7-42). He came to serve others (Mark 10:45). He prayed for others (John 17). He visited in homes (Luke 19:1-10). He reached out to sinners (John 8:1-11).
Since we can do all things through Christ as He lives His life through us, we can ignite a culture of biblical friendliness in our local congregation that will be contagious for Christ and to others!!
“That congregation is so friendly! They are genuine; they really care!”
Many, many thoughts were shared yesterday across America about the Sunday church services— the preaching, the music, those born again, the length of the service, the nursery, the interruptions, the coffee and donuts at fellowship time, the bulletin, the temperature in the building, baptisms, the empty pews, or full-house, etc.
What were some of your comments?
Now, let’s consider another familiar statement made about the local church that I hope will encourage and edify.
“I’m not getting fed at our church.“
Certainly, it is every pastor’s privilege and responsibility to teach the Word of God (1 Timothy 3:2; 4:12-16; 2 Timothy 3:16-17; 4:2). This mandate is not taken lightly. God commanded us to feed the flock of God (1 Peter 5:2) with “good grain” from the Word.
Nevertheless, the responsibility for your spiritual growth is not the pastor’s. You are to be a student of the Word (Joshua 1:8; Psalm 1:1-3; Hebrews 5:12-14) hiding it in your heart (Psalm119:11) and making it your own in daily application. As the pastor feeds you, it whets your appetite to grow and know your God more and more. If your pastor is weak in that area, pray for him. Pray that his early morning hours will be a time of intimate relationship with God. Pray that Truth will so grip him that on Sundays he will preach from the “overflow.” The hours he spends in sermon preparation is time consuming as well as physically and mentally demanding. Perhaps he is doing too much in ministry. Ask him what you can do to lighten his load so he can pray and study. He has not been “hired” to do the entire soul winning, visitation, discipleship, and administration of the church. You need to join up with him in teamwork for the Savior. Meet with your under-shepherd for coffee and pray that you may come to know him, encourage him and be his “Barnabas.” Remember them … who have spoken unto you the word of God … for they watch for your souls, as they must give an account, that they may do it with joy, and not with grief (Hebrews 13:7, 17).
I close with a reminder. The local church consists of sinners. It is a spiritual hospital for a sin-sick, mentally-hurting, heart-broken, doubting, discouraged, worn-out society. For every issue of life, Christ and His Word is the answer, the remedy. Therefore, point to Christ first in all things in the church (Colossians 1:15-19). It is His Church. He died for it (Ephesians 5:25).
By the way, a lost world is watching and listening to us. Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers (Ephesians 4:29). What have you said about your local church this past month? What have you said about your Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ?
Dale Cunningham is the pastor of Boones Creek Bible Church in Johnson City, TN.
He blogs at From a Pastor’s Heart, we republish his material with permission.
[Ed. Note: This post combines three of Pastor Cunningham’s posts into one. For a related post, see “Take a Breath“]
Photo by Jackson Simmer on Unsplash